JustMarl

its a freakin 2.37am and I couldn’t shut my eyes.

RM presentation, Osha test and HR test AND Arab oral’s test are coming up earlyy mornin lagi. tadi time nk bace OSHA nantok gile plak smpai menguap bape blas kali. da tido tanak lene lak. hm.

tonight, i think i needed someone to talk to. but i have NOOO cluee who to talk with? NO CLUE at all. well, ade la mcm a short list of names. tapi.. lepas pk dlm. maybe i shudnt bother them ngn cite boring ak. zzz

maybe dorang akan tetido smpai 5 kali sbb bosan sgt.

i want to call him too. tapi wait. aku x pnah amek taw pasal die, so bile tibe2 aku ade masala, and i feel so bad and rase nk talk to someone, aku call die plak? NO NO NO. tats mcm selfish gile kalau aku wat. even aku taw aku ni selfish, but i dont want to seem mcm btul obvious gile k. haha.

i just want this week to end cpt2.. sbb lepas sminggu dah survive, by tat time mesti aku taw aku ley survive another week, and another and another.. kot? im sure i wont live tat long..so harap2 mende camni x bagi halangan kt aku utk bsukerie and appreciate those small little things yg happens to be everywhere around us.

OH im sorry. I didnt mean to give u a cold shoulder. tp aku tade mood sgt2 mase ko dtg bilik tadi. sorry mira.. i dont want to let it out to u too, so sbb tu aku jwb mcm tanak jwb. sorry tat i dont even looked at you. :[

to that special someone, one of my childhood bestfriend.. i know tat we’re not dat close like how we used to be,and i might not be the first person you gonna call if anything, but..i just want you to know, ill always pray for ur safety, health and may Allah blesses you, give you the strength to overcome things.. I know it hurts as hell. and it still is. I just decided to ignore it even sometimes the stupid memories just came knocking on ur brain wall? i sorang je ade wall kt luar brain.if ade the surgery utk erase certain memory, your the first i cari and begged at. hahaha. zzz well, im sure the first 2 weeks, or first 2 months? gonna be theeee mossstt difficult one.. but im sure you’re strong enaf to go thru dat. remember, Allah takkan uji hamba Dia dgn something yg He knows you couldn’t overcome. you deserve so much better. SO SO SO much better. and I love you.

“Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself. You have to know that you’re a good person and a good friend. What’s meant to be will end up good and what’s not - won’t. Love is worth fighting for, but sometimes you can’t be the only one fighting. At times, people need to fight for you. If they don’t, you just have to move on and realize what you gave them was more than they were willing to give you. Hopefully, people realize great things when they come around and not lose something real. Always fight, until you can’t anymore, and then be fought for.”

 

ok. so pengajaran utk hari ini is..

maliza sile jgn open up sgt. you dont want to get attached. cos you’re just gonna end up gettin hurt okay?

REMEMBER THE PAIN. REMEMBER.